When I was newly divorced I joined a club for single parents with kids on Meetup. I was excited to go to my first event, overnight camping in upstate Georgia.
I had a 5 year old and did not possess a tent, so I chose to rent a cabin near the campsite. Indoor plumbing rocks but most of all I am terrified of the mosquitoes that emerge in Georgia in the summer. They are relentless and for some reason I seem to attract more mosquitoes than anyone I've ever known.
Anyway, the first night at the camp site we were all sitting by the camp fire while our children frolicked in the sand nearby. Campfire and wine, I was almost in heaven, as it kept the mosquitoes at bay. I was asked by a woman lounging near me in an ever-so-casual tone, "So are you divorced or never-been-married?" I wasn't really prepared for that question, it seemed out of place to me. Why would it matter? But since then I've realized that is a common question in a single parent's group. Apparently, the class system is still at play.
I found out that the divorcees are the more privileged class, as it comes with certain expectations of alimony or child support, or sometimes in case of a formerly wealthy husband and a good lawyer, a mansion, a luxury car, and a big checking account.
It made me think that no matter what the circumstances, it's human nature to start segregating based on whatever assets people possess.
If we all were on a desert island, people would get segregated too, maybe based on access to food or water or the ability to procure it. Made me think of the "Lord of Flies" a brilliant book by William Goldman.
Are these instincts to classify, segregate just our natural preservation instincts taking over? Can we walk away from these urges, and conquer our more primal selves? Ultimately, what does it mean to be human?
I had a 5 year old and did not possess a tent, so I chose to rent a cabin near the campsite. Indoor plumbing rocks but most of all I am terrified of the mosquitoes that emerge in Georgia in the summer. They are relentless and for some reason I seem to attract more mosquitoes than anyone I've ever known.
Anyway, the first night at the camp site we were all sitting by the camp fire while our children frolicked in the sand nearby. Campfire and wine, I was almost in heaven, as it kept the mosquitoes at bay. I was asked by a woman lounging near me in an ever-so-casual tone, "So are you divorced or never-been-married?" I wasn't really prepared for that question, it seemed out of place to me. Why would it matter? But since then I've realized that is a common question in a single parent's group. Apparently, the class system is still at play.
I found out that the divorcees are the more privileged class, as it comes with certain expectations of alimony or child support, or sometimes in case of a formerly wealthy husband and a good lawyer, a mansion, a luxury car, and a big checking account.
It made me think that no matter what the circumstances, it's human nature to start segregating based on whatever assets people possess.
If we all were on a desert island, people would get segregated too, maybe based on access to food or water or the ability to procure it. Made me think of the "Lord of Flies" a brilliant book by William Goldman.
Are these instincts to classify, segregate just our natural preservation instincts taking over? Can we walk away from these urges, and conquer our more primal selves? Ultimately, what does it mean to be human?
